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The Conversation Starters
1. When she is first offered the assignment from Femme, Sarah has disdain for any woman who would go on a show like The Stag. Has the reality mating phenomenon "Reduced single women to parading in front of men like livestock," as the editor believes? Are reality mating shows empowering women or endangering feminism? Who really has the power, the man who gets to choose the woman or the woman who gets to make him want her? Why are reality mating shows so popular?  

2. Jack "lets" Sarah try out for the show, and eventually go to California. Did she really need his approval? Would she have gone anyway? Deep down, did Sarah want to find out what it was like to seduce another man? Was she being naive or did she know exactly what she was doing?  

3. Sarah mentions "the plan" several times throughout the book. Ultimately, the well laid out life plan Jack and Sarah created is what ended up driving them apart. Do you have "a plan" that you're following? Have you, like Sarah, had to rethink the plan because it no longer reflected what you want? What are the pros and cons of following "the plan?"  

4.Once Sarah's in the thick of the Stag frenzy, she finds herself getting pulled into the competition. Why doesn't she put up more resistance? Did she cross the line of infidelity the moment she let herself become attracted to the Stag?  

5. At one point Vanessa tells Sarah what it's like to "hit the big three-oh and become a social pariah." She goes on to recount how her married friends have left her behind in their pursuit of all things wifely. Do women change when they get married? Is it necessary that they change? Is it impossible to maintain the same level of friendship once a friend has taken the march down the aisle?  

6.The TV world of The Stag is darn near perfect - dinners and overnight trips that feed romantic aspirations, fashionable attire that flatters, easy conversation that stays on the fringe of anything remotely controversial. With everyone on their best behavior, are reality mating games anything like reality? Is it really so different from real life where first impressions and playing "the game" are just as important in the beginning of a relationship? When do men and women really begin to show their true selves in relationships?  

7. Sarah went on the show thinking that she was very different from the hens. In what ways was she similar? How was she different?  

8.Sarah could have blown out her candle at any time. Why did she continue to stay in California? Was she trying to prove something to Jack? To herself? To Suzanne? If she had left, what would she have lost?  

9. When Sarah returns home, things are different between her and Jack. What did Jack learn in Sarah's absence? Does Sarah look at Jack differently having been away from him? Should Jack have forgiven Sarah or is what she did unforgivable?  

10. How did her experience on The Stag change Sarah? What did she learn from the hens, the Stag, and Sloane Silverman?

Bachelorette #1, Available at bookstores August 5 or on-line at either: